Monica Lewinsky: “I Am Determined to Have a Different Ending to My Story”

Posted Tuesday May 6, 2014 1:24 PM GMT

She’s been known as President Bill Clinton’s mistress for well over a decade, but Monica Lewinsky isn’t willing to be defined by her past.

In a new interview with Vanity Fair, the former White House intern breaks her silence about her involvement in the scandal that birthed a massive investigation into the Commander-in-Chief’s philandering.

Lewinsky begins, “It’s time to burn the beret and bury the blue dress. I, myself, deeply regret what happened between me and President Clinton. Let me say it again: I. Myself. Deeply. Regret. What. Happened.”

“I’m done tiptoeing around my past. I am determined to have a different ending to my story. I’ve decided, finally, to stick my head above the parapet so that I can take back my narrative and give a purpose to my past. (What this will cost me, I will soon find out.)”

Monica also notes, “Sure, my boss took advantage of me, but I will always remain firm on this point: it was a consensual relationship. Any ‘abuse’ came in the aftermath, when I was made a scapegoat in order to protect his powerful position. I turned down offers that would have earned me more than $10 million, because they didn’t feel like the right thing to do.”

That being said, Lewinsky had a hard time getting a job after the massive fallout. “I was never ‘quite right’ for the position. In some cases, I was right for all the wrong reasons, as in ‘Of course, your job would require you to attend our events.’ And, of course, these would be events at which press would be in attendance.”

And eventually Monica decided to stand up for others who were being bullied in the press and on the internet like she was. “Perhaps by sharing my story, I reasoned, I might be able to help others in their darkest moments of humiliation. The question became: How do I find and give a purpose to my past?”

“My goal is to get involved with efforts on behalf of victims of online humiliation and harassment and to start speaking on this topic in public forums.”

Photo Credit: Getty Images